Thinking and Identifying Reason.

I knew I had a direction for my project but I somehow could not pinpoint what to do next. I knew there were struggles in being human and I wanted to bring these to light.

Things like this get me thinking too much. About how I can make a project relevant to a career. Potentially ways I can utilize management or an app or sustainable supply process or a distraction or a story or a world or a webpage or photography or policy. . .something, anything to help others. It always gets me stuck because I find my mind fighting against the structure of the world which then leads me to become existential.

Thoughts like this make me want to escape to reclaim my sanity and sense of hope. Admittedly, I believe the racing thoughts have caused a survival response to just numb myself. So this time around, I decided to escape and destress by doing yoga. Afterwards, I realized that what I feel after doing yoga matters because it’s the feeling of peace – a clearer mind, unburdened by obligation. I wanted others to feel this way too.

The reason I can convince myself that this truly matters to me is because we live in a world where it’s easier to follow the norm and numb ourselves mindlessly through “entertainment.” And I’ve been there too. And I’ve somehow taken the pain that comes from this personally when I was growing up. Declining health, increasing numbness, saying yes to everything even the toxic bits, saying no to everything else. Even as a little kid, I’ve always always felt that it didnt have to be this way. I have none of the answers but - hey - I could cope. And in the process, I discovered the difference between healthy and unhealthy coping. Reflecting on this and recent events (declining health once again and unhealthy coping – re-transitioning to helathier coping), I’ve decided I want to bring people the experience of being at rest. Because only then can we be us and not a product of our obligations or distractions. We need to treat ourselves as more human than objects (insert Kant stuff here)

Discovering/Parsing.

I had a lot of thoughts to parse and reflect on. So I binged watched shows, old videos, and TED Talks hoping to find something to relate to until I stumbled upon this:

I was surprised to learn that it featured 2 of my favourite TED Talks featuring Tim Urban and Andy Puddicombe. This along with other insight the other talks brought made me realize that instead of trying to figure out something as complex as connection, I wanted to do something simpler: get people to slow down.

Writing Stuff Down.

insert pictures here later

Pictures are not here because I actually used a notebook (digital is easier to document/post because the cloud exists and therefore less of a need to trasnfer files around).

I wrote down phrases and ideas that came to mind such as:

• “play with me” vs “talk with me”
• unexpected vs predictable
• etc

Some of the things I wrote down were movements I wanted the interaction to cause such as stretching or reaching.

Essentially its few random words just to process my ideas. Some words led to others but nothing as big as a mind map.